Its been a long time

it really has been a long time since my last post. To know why, you would have to know me better. How could you possibly know better of me when you dont even know the basics of Amin? Before I get carried away and start typing like an arrogant prick, i should just say that this post is about me.

First of all, I like to talk. A lot. Upon uneasiness, i would say that its because time is golden. I'm not like those with abilities to communicate with people effortlessly. I need to think. I need to predict. I need to plan. I need a strategy. Communication among creatures is not just as simple as your so called "talk". IT IS WAR. Which apparently doesnt even make sense, because theres nothing to fight over. Then again, actual war doesnt make sense either. At least the modern ones doesnt.

Anyway. Time is precious. If i dont have the ability to actually make good conversation in a good-conversation-time, then let there at least be A conversation. Be it talking by myself for 30 minutes, or even better, talking TO myself for an hour (i dont have that many conversation time). Anything goes. Time doesnt repeat itself so we can do better in it. We repeat the same thing over and over again in hope that it does.

But personally, i just want more people to know more about me. Asking too much questions to someone is nosy, but not talking at all is just wrong.(well, not really)

About asking. I really do like to ask questions. I am not those of the gossip groups. Or at least those with actual information (by "actual", i mean it involves the real world, not comics or fictions). So i always intend to ask a lot of questions. Dont get me wrong. Its not fair that someone with the same social ability knows more of the real world just because he was there to evesdrop, and tells me i'm nosy when i ask about it. Nosy is wanting to know personal information. Its reasonable to be shunned upon because its someone's right to privacy. But the fact that your telling others about it is really really wrong. Asking a question about someone shows that i actually care about him/her. Not to abuse and gossip about it. Just pure curiosity.

Curiosity kills the cat? Well, ignorence of a certain frog under a certain coconut shell caused it to be so depressed and killed itself out of loneliness and information retardation. Probably not even knowing that being squished under a tire is not as fun as it sounds.

But seriously, i like to ask questions. I always find myself asking a cashier of a shop about an item. Or a cashier of a fast food restaurant of his/her opinion. Or anywhere that makes food about how its made and the ingredients. Its fun to know all the fun facts. And you would know more about what you but, or going to buy (or wont ever buy).

Next is that i'm very light boned. This would mean that i'm diligent, likes to help people, or just not getting enough calcium. I'm trying to fix the last one. But yeah. I have a bit of all of them. But my diligence is limited to things i actually like. I do like a lot of things, for various reasons unknown and shall not be known to any living creature (i can tell you if your fall dead after hearing it). But thats another story. And i only help people when it in someway makes me think it will benefit me in some way. That sounds messed up. I really shouldnt type long posts at this time of night.

But seriously, i just like it. I always try to do things the hard way, or walk the long path. Its just my way to learn more about something. Some comic once said to me that to advance in life, we must first learn the basics of life (i forgot the actual sentence and just made that up). Going the long way gives the chance to see more stuff that people ignore for the sake of saving time so that they can waste it on something else that seems worth wasting time on but is actually not. Like the internet. I seriously need sleep right now.

There are other artributes of myself, but lets save it for later. i dont type well when i dont open my eyes.

But i have 2 things that I call sickness that covers up all the above angelic traits.

First is shyness. or rather fear.
Upon my growth to this point of time, i had many expirience in life. Bitter or sweet. Much like anyone else. But each have a different effect. Most events have the same effect on people, but cumulatively, each brings out a different personality.

My past mistakes and supposedly-wrong deeds had caused me to value heavily what people think of me. Its the whole foundation of my survival. I'm not going to blabber-type any of it in this post. That would be awful. But just understand that i really fear bad perceptions by others.

Thats one way to explain it. Another is simply plain shyness. Like talking to a stranger. Or making friends. But it usually goes away if a person i think i would never see again is involved. Most of whom have gone on trips with me, just the two of us, would understand this. But for those who dont, imagine going out with me, and i start walking funny, talking funny, making wierd gestures and remarks, generally not making sense at all. Thats a sign of total unshyness. You could probably see something fly away from my head into the sky at some point we're together.

And now i'm really annoyed by the cheering outside. Random thought.

The second sickness is total random-unlogical-complex-just-plain-wierd laziness. This covers the general laziness to study. The randomness comes when i'm deciding not to give and example because it sounds funny typing like this and making you think i'm wierd. Random enought? dont ask.

An actual example is like typing every word in this post with correct spelling and grammar, because i'm too lazy to explain to anyone who doesnt understand any short-forms. I do my homework a week early because i'm too lazy to do it the next week. And so forth.

So that completes "about amin : typing-at-4-in-the-morning version"

really like to post stuff, but just cant seem to move my body whenever i want due to extreme laziness.

Owhyeah. I also am easily flattered. Everything that i think is a compliment or at least makes me think that you care about me, it would go to my head and amplified by a figure of gajillion (a word invented for the imaginary number in my head). I do like it. But i'm worried i might take it too seriously.

No proper ending. Must find pillow to sleep. Must move finger to button. touchpad too annoying. Must post before more annoying yelling of annoying football watching people annoys me....*press*